Thank you so much for your very kind comment and support. Certainly LGBT people need straight allies just like you that love us, understand and support us. This is especially needed in communities of faith and even more especially in the Orthodox Church where it can be exceptionally difficult to be gay.
Please stay in touch.
I bid you peace,
Andriy

James,

Thank you for your email. I could not agree with you more. Everyone needs to decide and judge the situation they find themselves in. However, as people of faith, we need to trust in God and listen to the inner voice as to what He is telling us to do and believe that He will protect and guide us. We have all found ourselves in situations when we ignored what we later understood to be God talking to us.

While I agree with you that many LGBT who od not make waves in a parish, especially in a larger one, will be accepted or even ignored, that is not always the case or the situation. Many Orthodox find themselves in areas where there is only one Orthodox parish, and everyone there knows everyone else. There are also nosy priests and nosy parishioners. And then we must consider that people want to be open and honest with their priest, and many are worried what might happen if they were open and honest.

You are of course right that there are numerous compassionate, understanding priests, but unfortunately there are also many who are stubborn and refuse to accept or see the beautiful diversity of God’s creation. I have also heard my fair share of anti-gay sermons from the amvon.

I always love to hear from you and read your thoughts.
Please be well.
I bid you peace,

Andriy

Dearest Elena,

Thank you for your email and support of this website. My heart aches for you because I understand you. After I left the active priesthood, I also hard a time, bit when in church and when I stayed away. I would talk with your wife and explain how you feel. Certainly you can just go to Church to be in the presence of God and His icons, hear the music, small the incense and pray. When you feel comfortable, you will know when it is right to approach the priest for confession and then you can also decide if to tell him you are gay. If you believe that God created you as a gay woman, then you would not need to confess that. But, I would advise you to take one step at a time.

Concerning corresponding with the priest in Alaska. I do not know him, but you need to pray on this topic and ask God for His guidance and trust that He will help you, both in deciding if to write and what to write. Certainly you will make him think. But the first thing you want to consider is your own relationship with Christ and His Church. Take some time, reflect and then act cautiously, but always remember that God loves you, and He is always with you to guide and help you.

I bid you peace. Please stay in touch,

Andriy

Isaac,

Thank you again for supporting this website with your thoughts. The rejection that you write about is very real for many of LGBT Orthodox. It is the same fear that many of us live in our families, places of employment, where we live and even in our friendships. This is a calculated risk that we each have to measure for ourselves. There are times that I can feel safe holding my husband’s hand in public and there are times when I sense a judgment or danger. No one can make that decision for anyone else.

However, I do think that we need to trust in God a bit more as well as in others. “You shall step on the lion and the vipers” according to the Psalmist, but we will be protected and delivered. But we also have to use our brain that God gave us. But since God already knows who you are, we have to have some faith that He will guide us and protect us.

Concerning the late, blessed, Father Hopko. I admire many of his works and bow at the immense work he did in numerous areas. But in the area of homosexuality, I believe that he was mistaken. On this website you will find a review of the book that he wrote on same-sex attraction.

Always live, dear Isaac, as if you know God loves us, because He does. And to quote a beloved friar from the West, “always preach the Gospel, when necessary, use words.

I bid you peace,

Andriy

Although there are countless stories of gay/lesbian people being banished from their parish by a furious priest or shunned by their fellow worshipers, I’ve often thought that because priests have a solid understanding that sin is ‘just’ falling short of the mark Christ sets and not something abhorrent and because they have seen first-hand the struggles all of their parishioners go through in daily life while trying their best to follow Christ, priests may well be better equipped to accept gay/lesbian people for who they are and offer compassionate acceptance than are some of the rank-in-file members of their congregation.

Also, I have come across writings from Orthodox authors (one of them being Father Hopko) that talks about same-attraction. I assume the worst and don’t even bother because usually, they talk about an experience completely unknown to them. Think of it like this, when various European countries were diving up the African continent as to who gets what, guess who wasn’t invited to have a say in this? The Africans. Likewise, with these books and clergy they talk about what they do not know instead of inviting us to share our stories. It is the same with the entertainment media, consumers don’t want to hear rappers or hip-hop artists sing about disadvantaged youth struggling to get by and overcoming odds, no, they want to hear about sex and drugs. Likewise, the similar happens with layity and clergy, they don’t want to hear stories of LGBT+ people who live Christ-centered lives, help their community, etc. They just want to hear bad things about us, which are not even true. This is why we must be the change we wish to see in the world.

I know God is calling me and I feel it through my prayers and spiritual life. Truly, God loves His LGBT+ children as well. I wish to be that light to others.